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This is a touchy subject. There aren’t any easy answers, but there are answers. There are hard truths that may be difficult to accept. Always seek the advice of a professional before making any major decisions.
On today’s episode:
[1:59] 1. People who are controlling, meddling
[8:01] 2. People who won’t let you grow and change
[10:55] 3. People who like to pick fights
[13:10] 4. People who play the victim
[13:58] 5. People who withhold affections
[16:21] – Taking the direct approach
[16:47] – When the direct approach doesn’t work
[17:43] – Why putting distance between you and toxic family can be a healing thing
[18:55] – The downside of putting distance between you and toxic family
[20:13] – A case study on drawing the line
[21:10] – Showing compassion to toxic family
Subscribe/rate/review I would be most grateful
Until next time, I wish you peace in the midst of toxic people. Take care
- Fantastic GuidanceFebruary 25, 2020 by CLP14 from United States
I have worked with a therapist for close to five years and Dr. Williams reinforces my therapist’s insights and guidance. Dr. Williams is spot on and I love her no nonsense approach. Her university students are lucky to have someone like her in their young lives. wish I’d had a professor like her early in my life, before I continued some codependent behaviors that caused a lot of pain.
- AmazingDecember 26, 2019 by Bentbutnotbroken74 from United States
I love this podcast and I needed this info and positive but yet straight shooting delivery! Thank you!
- EmpoweringSeptember 29, 2019 by CamSays from United States
I really appreciate Dr. Shayla’s ‘practical advice’ on dealing with toxic people. She encourages her listeners to take responsibility where they can, to learn that their own self love and respect is the most powerful force to use in relationships. She reminds you of your power so you can stop feeling like a victim. I agree with another commenter- PLEASE get new intro music!!! The current dissonance makes my ears bleed and is, well.....toxic to my enjoyment of the podcast.
- Love this!September 17, 2019 by Loopylooloo9999 from United States
I listen to these over and over especially when I’m unsatisfied at work or dealing with difficult situations. Shayla always gives me a different perspective!
- 7 Reasons why toxic people...September 3, 2019 by HMSDesign from United States
I’m in Love with Shayla D Williams, so insightful. I learned a lot about myself and some of the toxic people I’ve aloud in my life. This show is something I can take with me in all my budding relationships
- Direct!August 22, 2019 by JennieBeanParachutePants from United States
I appreciate how direct Dr. Shayla is. The information is great for a lay person.
- Love Dr. ShaylaAugust 19, 2019 by ashcat310 from United States
My new favorite pod!!! Love the tough love ❤️
- Thank you!!July 12, 2019 by x3_selegna from United States
- Count Paris VeronaJune 16, 2019 by P Verona from United States
- get rid of that awful music!!June 15, 2019 by Nuu22 from United States
The podcast is great and helpful and quippy. But PLEASE get rid of that intro and outro music. So not serious and annoying sounding.
- You are the G.O.A.T!June 5, 2019 by MKW03 from United States
Being new to the podcast world I didn’t know where to begin. Your podcast was the first thing that popped up, so I gave it a try and I thank god I did. Your podcast came in my life right on time, just when I thought my life was the worse, I had no way of viewing situations or handling them. I had issues with saying no, I worried about what people thought, I had no self esteem. But your podcast has shown me I am better, and who cares what people think. You’ve shown me I can take up for myself and I deserve and I demand respect. Thank you!
- An answer to my prayers!June 1, 2019 by C-Sharpness from United States
Does podcast help me defend myself in a much more affective way and avoid a lot of possible hurt and frustration during a very difficult time at work. I don’t know how I would’ve survived without it. Thank you!!!.
- So goodMay 29, 2019 by Has a glitch from United States
If there’s someone in your life you suspect to be toxic to your life, you must listen. Or, if possibly there’s an aspect/aspects of life you want to change, you must listen. Anyone could benefit from this podcast!
- Eye opening & straightforward!May 15, 2019 by auntdaci from United States
This podcast has been very clarifying & empowering for me! Dr. Shayla is so good at modeling how to be assertive and clear with others. The podcast episodes are concise and stay on topic, the intro and outro are brief (a personal pet peeve I have with some other podcasts lol. I don't like feeling, "ok, get to the topic already!" She just gets right to it.) "Wishing you peace in the midst of toxic people" is a good reminder that I carry with me now. I can keep my peace even when I'm in the middle of the chaos. If I had one piece of constructive criticism it would be this- I would love to hear some new examples of ways that this has manifested in her life (or maybe in the lives of other people, if she doesn't have other personal examples.) She often sites the same examples in multiple episodes (the church volunteer thing, the professor asking her to get her laundry, etc.) and I would like to hear new and different ones. I think it would help me be better able to recognize when different red flags are coming up in my own life, and practice staying calm and assertive when people are getting into manipulative behaviors. Anyhow, I still learn from her real life examples so it's not a deal breaker for me, just a thought. I'm so grateful for this podcast. Thanks to Dr. Shayla!
- Thank you, Dr. WilliamsMay 11, 2019 by lordbyrn from United States
So helpful! This podcast has brought me so much clarity and inspired me to reflect on a lot of my relationships
- Thank youApril 26, 2019 by EricaWalker from Australia
This podcast is fantastic. Until I listened to it I had no idea why I was feeling the way I was at work. I then learnt about gaslighting and toxic behaviour. This podcast has given me an understanding of what was happening to me. So happy to hear it was not me going nutty! I was being exposed to a toxic person and it wore me down. I did not handle myself well in the situation either and I am sad to have lost some work relationships that were important to me. I am now educated and well be ready to do better if I am exposed to toxic behaviour again. Unfortunately or maybe it was a good thing, I did move jobs to get away from the toxic behaviour. Let the future be be better. Thank you.
- Great listen!April 16, 2019 by nicolee328 from United States
Wow! Great podcast! People need detachment, it helps in so many other ways- reducing anxiety and stress of situations. It’s not something you hear everyday but something everyone should be practicing!
- First review of a podcastMarch 26, 2019 by staleilin from United States
I have listened to many podcasts over the years, and this is my favorite. It deserves ten stars. Describes my brother in law to a T! I have learned how to cope with him, and many other toxic people.
- Best Therapist on Poscast!!!March 21, 2019 by Indy1985! from United States
I’ve been searching for a great podcast that incorporates mindfulness, critical Thinking and logical! I happen to stumble on Dr. Shayla, but she is A.M.A.Z.E and down to earth!! Keep it coming Doc!
- The only podcast I have ever left a review forMarch 2, 2019 by ramenka from United States
This podcast continues to be my all time favorite mental health related podcast. Dr. Shayla has taught me things that I should have learned years ago from my parents
- Annoying theme song...February 26, 2019 by ellen3141 from United States
But very helpful podcast. I wish I had found it sooner. Lots of practical information!
- Awesome podcast!February 20, 2019 by nuna_hafoka from United States
I love this podcast, I love how she is straight too the point and the way she words things is very understandable! I love these keep making more! (Please) haha
- So helpfulFebruary 5, 2019 by Bethiebethiebethie from United States
She is the Doctor/Counselor/Friend that I have always needed.
- Practical AdviceJanuary 3, 2019 by LisaPTreats from United States
I am a school counselor and mother of 3. I find that each one of these topics applies to not only peoples daily life at home or work; it is direct advice that anyone can relate to. Thank you for your insight.
- Thank youNovember 28, 2018 by caracaraco from United States
This podcast has really brought reason, clarity, realization, and knowledge to my life. Keep it coming. Would love to have guest speakers, personal stories sent in for you to analyze, share, and advise on. Could you keep it going pretty please? 🙂
- Much neededNovember 28, 2018 by m29158 from Canada
I just want to start by saying thank you for making this podcast. I’m currently in this limbo of contemplation whether to keep or cut off an old friend. It recently hit me that they are toxic. Despite the advice I get from everyone around me, I still found myself putting so much of my energy into the why’s and how’s in hopes to avoid cutting them off completely. I just finished listening to a few episodes but one in particular provided so much clarity - “The Passive Aggressive” episode. Once again, thank you.
- Love her!!October 26, 2018 by ramenka from United States
I love this podcast! Dr. Williams is extremely insightful and breaks everything down into easily digestible material. Perfect for me to listen to when I feel defeated by a toxic person or environment
- Love this podcast!October 21, 2018 by AnnaZse from Canada
Extremely informative! Thank you for sharing your knowledge with us.
- Thank youSeptember 25, 2018 by caracaraco from United States
This podcast has really brought reason, clarity, realization, and knowledge to my life. Keep it coming. Would love to have guest speakers, personal stories sent in for you to analyze, share, and advise on.
- Really helpfulJuly 2, 2018 by KR0106 from United Kingdom
Practical advice that helps me to realise I’m not going crazy! I just wish the episodes were a little longer because I want to go a bit deeper.
- Incredibly clear and helpfulJune 23, 2018 by Horseradishtutu from United States
I stumbled on this podcast just this morning and listened to several episodes. I immediately forward the pertinent ones I thought two other people in my life would benefit from hearing. Interpersonal relationships and the nuances of emotional manipulations have been very difficult for me to assess in my own life as clearly as I would like. I feel what I have learned in the few episodes I listened to already have heightened my awareness and appropriate and inappropriate responsibility in some recent conflicts I have encountered. I appreciate this tremendously and look forward to listening to more. Thank you.
- I’m loving this podcast!June 14, 2018 by Ashley Ditto from United States
I found Dr Shayla today and I’ve listened to 10 podcasts already- her advice and thoughts are spot on for the own toxic people in my life. I’ve shared this podcast with friends and family- so they could listen too. Please keep sharing, Dr!!
- Thank you for an amazing podcast!May 29, 2018 by beyoubeautiful from United States
Loved his one! Spot on! Thank you!
- To the pointMay 16, 2018 by jacquelinemay9 from United States
I love this podcast and have gained a lot of insight from the topics discussed
- WowMay 1, 2018 by Janese Graham from United States
Thank you so much Dr. Shayla your podcasts has changed my life and my perspectives!!! I’m so excited I found you on here!! I will definitely share this with the people I love!!
- Listen to the DocApril 5, 2018 by LuxDivas from United States
Thank you for your wisdom in dealing with TOXIC people. Gone no contact!! Thanks!
- So needed to hear thisFebruary 26, 2018 by mimiYEAH!!! from United States
Thank you so much. I love listening to you. I have a toxic adult 42 stepdaughter is sooooo toxic. This helps!!!
- Powerful, practical insights!January 25, 2018 by Baltimore_Lady from United States
I highly recommend this powerful podcast for any fellow podcast afficionados who want to understand better how to deal with toxic people whom they encounter and also how to identify the behaviors and traits within themselves that draw toxic people to them. Host Shayla gives practical, honest observations, tips, and insights, as well as examples from her life and her dealings with toxic people. If you are looking to add more self-care to your life, listening to this podcast is an easy and great way to start.
- Much NeededJanuary 8, 2018 by Itsjussms from United States
- Wow!January 5, 2018 by Mrssunbaby from United States
Probably the most powerful, empowering podcast I've ever listened to. Shayla is honest, open, raw, powerful, and authentic. She brings with her real life stories and strong, grounded advice on how to deal with the most difficult people in your life. She provides the framework to draw the lines, set the boundries you need to take your life back, and build your authentic you! Thanks Shayla!
- Great podcast!January 1, 2018 by Marina Barayeva from United States
Everyone has met toxic people in their lives and sometimes you don’t know how to deal with them. This show goes through the different situations and Dr. Shayla looks through the details and gives her professional advice on how to behave or what to do there. Very helpful!
- Such great advice!January 1, 2018 by SheLovesMeSo from United States
Hope this podcast never ends. I wish they were long her I can listen to this podcast all day long! Every episode mAkes me feel me more In touch with my emotions and makes me want to be better. This is all I’ve needed. ♥️♥️
- Great Advice for us all <3December 31, 2017 by Thehighenergygirl from United States
Love it Shalya and will continue to listen! Thank you for your wisdom!
- Life savingDecember 31, 2017 by Barberjoshua from United States
Toxic people have dominated my life and I didn’t know of a way out, until now! Your ability to be so open and honest while sharing your personal experiences helps me to understand what steps are right for my situation. Please don’t stop this podcast!
- So needed today!December 30, 2017 by Anna Rova from Germany
This podcast is an absolute gem! This is what we all need today in our own lives. Less toxicity and negativity, more chill vibes and healthy boundaries! Thank you!
- I wish I had known about this podcast before.December 29, 2017 by jasoncavnesshr from United States
We all have toxic people in our lives. What separates us is how we deal with them. This podcast shows you how to deal with the toxic people and in doing so, improve your health.
- Love!December 29, 2017 by foureyedbookworm from United States
So glad to have found this podcast! Have searched high and low for this type of practical guidance and really appreciate what you’re doing. Thank you!
- This is NEEDED!December 29, 2017 by Adam Schaeuble from United States
What a great concept and resource that Dr. Shayla has put together for us! We all can use a little toxic people detox! I love how she attacks this concept from different angles. Great info! Keep these episodes coming Dr. Shayla!
- A Social Enema!December 29, 2017 by Dan Louzonis from United States
YES. This is such a terrific podcast and it fills an important void. We all need to shed people who are dragging us down AND preventing us from creating abundant lives.
- Excellent ShowDecember 29, 2017 by Duffash from United States
I always thought it was strange that we didn't learn these kinds of life skills in school. How different would the world be if everyone learned what this podcast teaches by the time we were 18? Great show! Filled with actionable steps to creating a better (drama free) life!
- There's a saying...December 29, 2017 by Nick @ Five Minutes With Dad from United States
"Show me your friends and I'll show you your future." It's based in the Bible (or perhaps earlier) but been used by a number of people since. The reason it's so popular is because the effect people around us have on our lives is profound. Removing toxic people from your life or removing their influence on you is one of the most transformational things you can do for your life. Great show!
- Love this podcast!December 29, 2017 by MarkRussellPhillips from United States
I love listening to Dr. Shayla! She shares gems of wisdom and insight in every single episode. We all have challenges in life and so many of these challenges come from family members, friends, and coworkers. Dr. Shayla gives great tips on how to deal with (and overcome!) each of the obstacles toxic people can put in front of us. Love this!
- So GoodDecember 23, 2017 by Applette24 from United States
Downloaded and watched all 19 episodes in a single sitting. Very insightful and so helpful. Thank you.
- Thank you!!December 15, 2017 by Abeec420 from United States
I just want to say thank you!! You have helped me understand so much!
- The important issue of the toxic people in our livesNovember 25, 2017 by Reach or Miss from United States
The podcast of Dr. Shayla raising an important issue of the toxic people in our lives. I think it's an issue I didn't give a space to in my life. I'm focusing all my life in so many good people that serounds me. However listening to the podcast and thinking about it was important and eye opening for me.
- Just what I needed!November 15, 2017 by Akbear47 from United States
Great podcast. Short and to the point. Great analogies. Exactly what I needed.
- New subscriber!November 8, 2017 by city_2_fitness from United States
I’ve been going through some rough patches, and instead of feeling sorry for myself have decided to make changes. Those changes include to stop feeling guilty for myself, I don’t like something, I have the power to change it. And that’s exactly why I’ve started listening to Toxic People Detox; how to better myself in the midst of dealing with toxicity.
- Awesome sauceNovember 4, 2017 by Angela Brown Oberer from United States
Just listened to episode 8 and it brought back a flood of memories of me learning to recognize signs from the toxic people in my life. What a great show and guide to emotional health and happiness. Thanks Shayla. ?
- Dealing With Toxic Family Members.....November 4, 2017 by Don Hutcheson from United States
I just enjoyed Dr. Shayla William's recent episode about how to deal with toxic family members. Clearly this is one of the most complex and difficult situations any individual finds her/himself in, and lamentably we are too often ill-equipped to handle them. Dr. Shayla's experience, insights and compassion come shining through in this episode as she guides the listener through some actionable steps that allow one to protect the emotional, physical, mental and spiritual aspects of him/herself while setting honest boundaries with family members at the same time. Well done in every way and much-needed! Wish you continuing success....
- Great showNovember 4, 2017 by TChan Games from United States
The arrogance and confidence is a good episode and put things into perspective. I sometimes get that I'm arrogant when I see it as confidence.
- A Total Game Changer!November 3, 2017 by Story Spectacular from United States
I just listened to the "Arrogance vs. Confidence" episode. Dr. Shayla hit upon so many issues that I have been struggling with. I am so happy that I have discovered this show! Thank you Dr. Shayla:)
- The podcast youNovember 3, 2017 by BillCPod1 from United States
Wow, it’s great to see a podcast tackling this huge issue of how to deal with toxic people. This is very much needed and we can all relate. Dr. Shayla does a fantastic job as the host!
- Thank youOctober 29, 2017 by This is a joke, right? from United States
Thank you for sharing your knowledge. This podcast comes at a time that I desperately needed guidance!
- Powerful podcast!October 23, 2017 by Maci Brinson from United States
Knowing how to deal with toxic people is one of many keys to success! Thank you so much for the opportunity to be on the show Dr. Shayla ? - Maci Brinson
How I WISH you could speak and work with my father. He is 4 of the 5 that you mentioned, and it is so hard to be his daughter. I’m happy to know that I have already done the first 2 steps you suggest taking, and have done the work to try and understand him (has has had a hard life, and has a lot of anger at the world and people in it) and have compassion, but the behavior continues, and I am still hurt by it. It is scary, but I will keep trying. I think distance is necessary and that is also terrifying. Because he does not respond well to my speaking up for myself, and. I don’t want to feel abandoned by him, either. But I MORE want my freedom and joy and peace. This stuff is so complicated and twisted, and I never thought that I’d be in it. Thank you for your podcast. Any good thoughts or prayers sent my way would be so appreciated.